Forgive, and be forgiven

Most of us find it extremely difficult to forgive everyone for the things they’ve done. Sometimes we have trouble forgiving someone for a minor act like calling us a name. Other times the sin we have trouble forgiving is much larger, like killing a loved one. Whatever the sin is we must learn to unconditionally forgive the one who sinned. Matthew 6:15 tells us:

“But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your father forgive your trespasses.”

We must forgive to be forgiven. We don’t like to think about this, and want to pretend there is some exception for us. Clearly whoever made that statement hasn’t been through what we’ve been through. Clearly they don’t know the pain we know. They’ve never had to forgive what we have to.

The problem with that is Jesus said those words, and He forgave everyone for everything. He forgave those who nailed Him to the cross as they were doing it. We have many justifications for not forgiving someone, but none of them really stand up when we consider the forgiveness of Jesus.

Often times whoever committed the sin feels no sorrow for their actions. We have convinced ourselves that someone not seeking forgiveness does not deserve it. This is untrue, and we must forgive someone even if they feel no remorse. Those nailing Jesus to the cross felt no remorse, and Jesus knew they had to be forgiven. Forgiveness is as much about the forgiver as the forgiven.

Other times it does not matter if the person apologized. We convince ourselves that what they did is so hurtful that we can continue to hold it against them. We want to be able to gossip about someone, and we enjoy holding a grudge against them because it often makes us feel better about ourselves to do so. Do not fool yourself into thinking that there is some exception to the rule of forgiveness. When you forgive someone that means you completely forgive them, and you do not hold their sin against them, gossip to others, slander them, or do anything that goes against forgiveness. You forget the sin, and give the sinner a fresh start. Refusing to only hurts you. You must forgive others.